Parenting with MS

By Matt Cavallo

Watching my oldest son, Mason, turn and walk into Kindergarten for the first time sent a flurry of emotions through my soul. I was feeling both proud and incredibly sad knowing that my baby was now a schoolboy. The sadness came from deep inside remembering back to how hard it was for my wife to conceive due to issues I was having as a result of my Transverse Myelitis and MS.

The pride came from thinking back to a childhood friend. When I was in Kindergarten, I had a friend in my neighborhood named Conner. His mother had Multiple Sclerosis and she was confined to a wheelchair. Even now, I remember Conner’s strength and the sacrifices he made as a five year old to care for his mother.

When I was diagnosed with MS, my biggest fear was that I was not going to be able to be the dad I had always dreamt of being. Deep down, I didn’t want my child to have to care for me in the way that Conner had to care for his mom. Now, eight years after my initial diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis, I proudly walked my Mason to his classroom, hand in hand.

As he let go of my hand and I watched him walk into a new chapter of life, I knew that his understanding of the world was going to grow each and every day. With his new understanding of the world, comes a new fear. How do I explain to him that his daddy is different from the other dads? How do I tell him that I have a neurodegenerative disease and that the big, strong guy he knows might not be that way forever?

As a young dad with a chronic disease, I have been looking for a way to talk to my boys in words they can understand. Especially for Mason who now has more questions than ever before. One of this resources that I have found in my search is, Daddy’s Story: An Introduction for Younger Children to Learn about a Parent’s MS. This is an illustration book for younger children that helps explain MS in words they can understand (don’t Matt and sonworry, moms – there is a Mommy’s Story too). With this resource, I am able to have a conversation with my boys and answer the questions that they have about my condition.

Knowing that there are resources to help me talk to my kids about my MS in a way that they can understand has helped to mitigate my fears and focus on the pride I have in raising two people who are loving and caring individuals.

*Matt Cavallo was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2005. Matt is an MS blogger, author, patient advocate, and motivational speaker. Matt also has his Master’s degree in Public Health Administration. Matt is the proud father of his two sons, loving husband to his wife, Jocelyn, and best friend to his dog, Teddy. Originally from the Boston suburbs, Matt currently resides in Arizona with his family. To learn more about Matt, please visit him at : http://mattcavallo.com/blog/

 

Share

MSAA’s Artist of the Month for September 2013

MSAA is very proud to present our 2013 Art Showcase – celebrating the work of artists affected by MS.

We have received many wonderful submissions from across the country and are delighted to share their work and their stories with you. Please visit our online gallery to view all of the MSAA Art Showcase submissions.

September 2013 Artist of the Month:
David Desjardins – Union, ME
Windmill

 Windmill by David Desjardins

“I’ve always loved to paint, but my work schedule and other commitments always seemed to get in the way. When I received my MS diagnosis, it was difficult to remain positive and find anything to be happy about. As time went on and I wasn’t able to work anymore, it occurred to me one day that my inactivity could be a good thing because at last I had a chance to paint!

There is very little in my life I have control over now, but one thing I do have control over is my painting. Creativity has always been part of who I am, but aside from being able to create something beautiful, I can escape the realities I face through my art – even if it’s only temporary.”
Read more

Be inspired – please send an online card featuring artwork by MS artist David Desjardins and spread awareness of MS and MSAA.

Share