There are so many aspects of life that can continuously change: your job position, friends, family, romantic relationships, your environment. But there is one thing that always remains: You. We often forget that we have a relationship with ourselves and how we nurture that can affect many other aspects of our lives.

The relationship you have with yourself is one that you carry with you every day and everywhere. Your thoughts, emotions, sense of identity, perspective on yourself and your connection to the world will ultimately affect your perspective on life and the various situations and relationships you encounter. A positive relationship with yourself is the foundation to a positive relationship with the world and people around you. But how do you determine what type of relationship you have with yourself? By asking yourself a few questions, you may be able to weave together the bigger picture.

• How do you speak to yourself?
• Do you remain dedicated to completing the goals you once set for yourself?
• Do you set time aside to experience the things you enjoy?
• Do you give yourself grace when things don’t go as expected?

The answers to these questions may decipher the type of relationship you have with yourself, and if there are some areas that you may need to be a bit gentler with. Although it may be easier to continuously water someone else’s flowers over your own, yours are just as, if not more important, to care for. If you struggle with self-kindness or caring for the relationship you have with yourself, here are some points that may help:

Speak to yourself as if you are speaking to someone you love

How you speak to yourself has a significant impact on your emotional well-being. Positive self-talk can help boost your confidence, reduce stress, and promote a more optimistic outlook on yourself, the people around you, and life in general. If you wouldn’t make a negative comment to someone you love, then why would you say it to yourself? You, after all, are someone you should love too! Reciting positive affirmations and being kind to yourself can make an enormous difference in your self-image and overall attitude towards yourself and others.

Give yourself grace, as you would with friends and loved ones

We are all human and everybody makes mistakes. But how we react to these occurrences can make all the difference. If a close friend of yours accidentally spilled a cup of water, would you make a big fuss out of it or would you help clean it and cheer them up? Most instances, the latter half would be the way to go. So why would you react otherwise with yourself? If grace and empathy are present, then your body will more than likely feel more comfortable with learning from mistakes.   

Care for your physical, mental, and emotional well-being

When you care for yourself internally, it will show externally. Fueling your body with nourishing foods, exercising or moving in a way that feels good to you, and partaking in activities that are beneficial to your mental and emotional health, are one of the greatest forms of self-love. Providing yourself with nutrition, sunlight, and whatever form of therapy you enjoy best is vital! 

All in all, it is nearly impossible to give to others if you do not first give to yourself in some capacity. By caring for yourself as you would your pet, children, partner, or friend, then you too will realize that your relationship with yourself is the greatest of them all.