By Lauren Kovacs
Relationships can be with your spouse, sibling, friends, parents or any living thing really. Sadly, MS contaminates everyone and every thing. It is ever changing. There is usually one symptom that takes the cake.
For me, the winner is fatigue. I swear a cloud of sleepy juice stalks me. It lurks behind corners and lays on me like a wet blanket. It will mess with every relationship and can smother events.
I often have to skip functions because of fatigue. The way I deal with it does not always jive with a particular gathering. Routines with MS work well, but not every event works around your routine. MS is not always flexible. People are happy to let babies nap; however, full grown adults don’t seem to get that same level of understanding.
I take half my “awake” medicine in the morning, nap, and then take the other half. This usually helps, but caffeine gum and coffee are heavily leaned on too. Not the best options.
My spouse knows my routine. Most people very close to me know it. There are times when my routine can’t be followed. Boy Scouts, soccer games, and Taekwondo sometimes jump in the path of my routine. I bend MS, as much as I can, in those situations.
The biggest effect of this is guilt. I fight guilt over missing the Pinewood Derby because I had to be at Taekwondo in the morning. I have guilt because I had to miss a soccer game because I have to nap. My parents had to go instead. It is a ripple. Asking for help often rolls into guilt.
I have to rest and miss some things and rely on my spouse, parents, or whoever. I deal with this balancing act all the time. I try not to tip the scale. Guilt and pride are always battling.
The guilt of asking for help and the pride of doing it myself tip back and forth constantly. People get mad because you didn’t ask for help, but the guilt of being a burden is often worse.
We carry heavy and complex weights to the scale. You have to try and balance that scale. Do the best you can. Others often do not see this part of MS. Getting those scales to balance can cause fatigue. Take a deep breath, do what you can, and have some chocolate.