I love being organized. I love containers and labels. I love having my finances organized and being able to find paperwork when needed. It brings me a sense of peace to plan things, be prepared and know what to expect. When everything has a place and is put away, it brings me joy. Living with a chronic illness like multiple sclerosis can be the exact opposite of that. It’s unpredictable, it disrupts plans, it can be invisible, and often it doesn’t have a logical reason behind the symptoms it brings. It can be manageable, but it’s not curable. Unlike my belongings, it can’t be fixed and controlled.
Okay, I hear you saying “you got this”… “no problem”… or the hackneyed, overused phrase “I have MS but it doesn’t have me.”
Yeah, I hear you tough guy/tough gal.
I hear you because I used to say the same. When I was diagnosed back in 1996, I thought MS didn’t know what it was messing with. I didn’t need any help. Didn’t need advice. Didn’t need to talk about it and burden someone else with my belly-aching. Continue reading →
As I age, I’m getting more intentional about who I spend time with and how I shape interactions. We can’t always completely avoid people who drain us, but we can shift how we approach our interactions. We can’t always spend enough time with the people we love, but we can shape our relationships to maximize our joy and connection. A lot of our daily lives involve acquaintances who with a small amount of attention can become friends. Our friends and family won’t always have the skills or perspective to meet our needs, but we can find circles of friends who will fill the gaps.
It is tough when dealing with MS. You don’t want to be the burden and the boil on someone’s bum. But, you also don’t want to seem stubborn in not asking for help. The winds of MS are blowing at each other. I get it.
Sadly we have to buffer the winds. Bad hair days from those winds are common. Keeping calm in the wind storm is hard. MS is a strong contender. Being calm can help avoid a flare.
I woke up this morning thinking about the past five years of my life. I get discouraged sometimes thinking about everything that has happened. I have days when I feel as if multiple sclerosis has flipped my world upside down and inside out. That my life, plans, dreams, and hopes have all changed more than I ever thought possible and I wasn’t prepared for the changes.
Many people go through life wishing they lived a life much like a scene from a movie where everything falls perfectly into place. Where they have Continue reading →
A friend told me one time that life is war. It is a battle between good and evil a fight between right and wrong. If that is the case, then multiple sclerosis is a beefed-up war on steroids AKA Solu-Medrol. This situation means that you should not go into battle with just anyone by your side.
I woke up in tears yesterday. No reason. Nothing bad happened to me in the middle of the night. I didn’t wake up from a nightmare, my goldfish didn’t die and I wasn’t in a lot of unbearable pain. My emotions just went haywire all on their own. I hate when that happens. I take meds to help keep my emotions stabilized, but yesterday’s dose must have been a dud.
Multiple sclerosis has this way of messing with a person’s emotions. Sometimes there’s a Continue reading →