Relationships are pretty often thought of strictly in the context of romantic attachments. Especially this time of year as we emphasize love and romance, couples, and all that comes along with it. But there are other relationships we sometimes forget to emphasize. Friends, family, co-workers, support group members, or neighbors. All of these, too, are relationships. It’s difficult in a world where things move a mile a minute and there is so much vying for our attention to remember to think of these other relationships and place some emphasis on them as well. Not just when the stores turn to red and pink and the costs of flowers rise to somewhat ridiculous levels.
While romantic relationships are important and make up a good portion of our understanding of relationships, support and encouragement for many often comes from those they are not romantically linked to. Friends who are there for us when we need a shoulder to cry on or a hand up when we are weak. Support group members who share their own story and listen to ours as we all try to live our lives as best we can and make the most out of all we have. Neighbors or co-workers who help us pass the time during work or who we bond with over community concerns and celebrations. These relationships, just as important as romantic ones, help shape both who we are as well as those around us and are strong bonds during trying and uncertain times. This month in addition to celebrating and relishing any romantic relationship we may be in and acknowledging the importance of this in our lives, let us take some time to also thank and celebrate the other relationships in our lives with people we love… just not in that way. Remind your friends and family what they mean to you or show appreciation and gratitude to your co-workers or support group members. It may not be the stuff of Hallmark movies but I’m sure they’ll really appreciate it that you took the time.
When talking about MS symptoms, many know how different and varied these can be with the disease – from the different types that can occur to their various degrees of severity, what affects one person can be very different to another. The symptoms that MS causes can not only have impact on the person experiencing them, but on those around them as well. Certain symptoms can impact relationships and unfortunately, once again, MS acts as if it has complete control over all facets of one’s life, but this is not the case. Not when individuals can do things and make choices to manage these symptoms and work hard to combat them as much as possible. It’s not easy or always a possibility, but MS has to know that it’s getting a fight from the other side and the disease is not always going to be victorious.
One of the MS symptoms that can have direct impact on relationships is issues with sexual dysfunction. This is usually a less talked about symptom and one that many shy away from discussing or disclosing. But it is one that deserves attention and awareness, because many can experience it and it’s important to know they’re not alone in this. It’s bad enough that MS causes symptoms that can impact daily routines, schedule, work habits and other factors, but really—does it also have to come between individuals sexually, in their most private moments and encounters? Come on MS, do you mind?
For those who have experienced these symptoms, one key element to battling MS in this scenario is communication. Again, we know this can be uncomfortable to disclose and openly talk about, but if these symptom issues go unaddressed, the persons involved in the relationship may not know or understand what’s going on, and if not given a chance to learn or be aware of it, it’s hard to move forward and manage with it together. Talking about it with a doctor or counselor can help to create a safe atmosphere to openly discuss what’s going on and brainstorm strategies and ways to help manage it. There can be other ways to help improve intimacy and interaction between each other, but it starts with recognizing the issues that are at play and what’s influencing them, because different factors in MS can attribute to these sexual dysfunction symptoms.
Again, MS may think it dictates everything that occurs in one’s everyday life, but there are some things that it really has no business being a part of…
Many people who have pets will admit that they do not need an excuse to give their pet extra attention and a little pampering, but did you know that there is a National Love Your Pet Day coming up on February 20th?
Having a pet or any kind of animal companion can offer a variety of benefits to anyone. Whether you are cuddling with a furry family member, or confiding your fears and frustrations to an attentive animal, our pets can reduce our stress levels, providing both physical and mental relief. Who hasn’t come home after a long day with a desire to just say hello to your pet, give them a pat on the head, or a belly rub? We can vent our frustrations and acknowledge the things that make us nervous and anxious to our pets, without fear of being judged for our thoughts. They support us without ever needing to actually speak back to us.
As some of our My MSAA Community members have said about their pets:
“Gidget is waiting for me every time I come home. No matter where I’m at she finds me. She is wagging from head to tail. I swear she knows when I’m sick because she follows me around like my little shadow.”
“My dog Razor has seen me through 5 ops in 5 years, never left my side.”
“My little kitty girl, Tux, is my daytime companion. She follows me around and sometimes even rides on the back of my chair. We like to sit in the sun and watch the birds in the trees in the backyard.”
Our pets are often considered an extension of our family and can easily be considered a care partner for many of us when we aren’t feeling our best. How has your pet been there for you?
MSAA is very proud to present our 2016-17 Art Showcase – celebrating the work of artists affected by multiple sclerosis (MS).
We have received many wonderful submissions from across the country and are delighted to share their work and their stories with you. Please visit our online gallery to view all of the new submissions.
|Patricia Heller – Sturgeon Bay, WI
Poppies Reaching for the Sun
About the Artist:
“Diagnosed ten years ago, my life dramatically changed.
As the years have gone on, I have become better at both watercoloring and handling MS. With painting, I have learned to watch the movement of the water and the paint and capture it to create the images I intend. With MS symptoms, I have learned to listen to what my body is telling me and then use everything I have learned (meditation, relaxation, exercise, stretching, drugs, and best of all, WATERCOLOR PAINTING) to manage MS.””